So, You Want to Be a Ski Bum?
First thing’s first, what is a ski bum? Well, in our eyes, a ski bum is something every keen skier should aim to be.
You ski as much as humanly possible, avoiding work at all costs. A true ski bum will scrimp and save at every given opportunity, never wasting money on necessities such as warmth or comfort.
So, you want to be a ski bum? We’ll show you how!
Give up your creature comforts
A true ski bum will ski, eat, sleep, repeat. No really – that’s it.
The only thing you spend money on is food!
Let’s spell it out for you. You’ll have to give up your car. Why would you waste money on getting around when the only place you’ll be going is the slopes? Plus, you’ll help save the planet, so good on you!
If you have a taste for the finer things in life, it’s time to get over this. Replace your steak with red wine jus for reheated pasta and pot noodles. You may have heard tales about the importance of nutrition on the slopes, but you can’t afford such luxuries.
Oh, and your 20-a-day habit and love for the pub will have to go too. You live to ski, only refuelling so you can ski more, nothing else!
Live life in the cheap lane
A true ski bum is never embarrassed to ask for free things.
‘Don’t ask don’t get’ is a motto to live by!
Hand-me-down ski wear? Yes please! Second-hand skis? Of course! Half-eaten sandwich? You won’t say no!
Watch out for rubbish skiers who are likely to injure themselves. Ask for their lift pass if they crash and go home early (sympathetically, of course).
Never be afraid to ask for a free drink. There are plenty of boozy ski resorts in the Alps, so you’re sure to find someone who gets flashy with cash at the bar. You can repay the kind donor with tales of your ski adventures.
Sacrifice unnecessary relationships
Your one and only love is the open slopes.
As a ski bum, you’ll never make your parents proud, but that’s okay. You don’t need them! Actually, maybe keep them around for when you run out of money.
Girlfriends and boyfriends on the other hand, they’ll have to go. Relationships like this will only distract you from skiing. They’ll want to ‘spend time with you’, which will eat away at your precious slope-time.
Your only friendships should be other ski bums! Form a posse, and go around skiing non-stop while tutting at the annoying people you encounter on the slopes.
Don’t be afraid to slum it
Sleeping on the floor will become common practice as a ski bum.
While others turn their nose up at a sleeping bag in the corner, to you, it’s a luxury Alpine chalet.
You can’t afford proper accommodation if you have chosen to follow the ski bum path in life.
Take a 6-month holiday
As a ski bum, working during winter is a huge faux pas. You can’t be waiting tables during the day to earn money for skiing – you won’t get to ski!
The ‘bum’ in ski bum isn’t earned through working during ski season.
Yes, this means during the warmer months, you’ll have to work hard. But hard work pays off! Just imagine the glistening white slopes while you slave away.
You may also like: The Most Annoying People You’ll Meet at a Ski Resort
Have your game face on
If you’re nice, people are more likely to be nice back. Simple as that. You can’t really go wrong with being friendly!
Science has shown that being nice is good for you, and who are we to argue with science.
The perks of being smiley and sociable are enormous. Most importantly, it will likely get you more free things.
Who would a barista rather give a spare coffee to, a happy-go-lucky ski bum, or a grumpy middle-aged businessman who’s been roped into a stag do? You decide.
Throw yourself into it
The best ski bums are the ones who do things properly.
Never try something if you’re not going to give it your best shot. If you’re looking for all the freedoms and adventure life can throw at you, you’ll love living the life of a ski bum.
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